Deer In The Headlights

(2014) Deer In The Headlights
01. Minds play tricks
02. It's still not to late
03. Bodies make mistakes
04. Filthy, lonely hearts
05. Your heroes are gone
06. Line/get in line
07. Storm inside
08. Calm after storm



01. Minds play tricks

I can already see myself
becoming something i hate
i know you’ll tell me im wrong
but im singing this song
convince me my life is not a lie
im tired of trying
if i could only suffocate
this voice
in my head
telling me
im worthless
like a hammer to the ground
they pin me down
tell me im wrong
i’ll play along
no wait
i’d rather
be alone



02. It's still not to late

I wish i could burn all my clothes
and not worry about the cost
sometimes a glance is all that it takes
to hate everything about myself
tear old pictures apart
burn it to the ground
maybe cut my hair
start over again
a brand new life
in a new house
with new friends and family
sometimes it seems
that’s all it takes
for problems to go away
but everyone knows
that you take your holes
with yourself no matter how far you go
i don’t expect you to understand
why i feel like running away most of the times
i pay the price of clothes i wear
every time im awake
people say try
easier said than done
i am sorry for no appreciating
every single bit of effort
you put into
sewing new clothes for me
raising a decent human being is hard
i hope you’re satisfied



03. Bodies make mistakes

Burning my clothes was hard
everything black comes from afar
cutting my hair was hard
every single means we went to far
scent of burning lingers
leaves blister on fingers
fallen hair still there
made nothing go away
still i have the dirt under my nails
i have washed them
but i’ve cut too much
so i tell you again
touching with these is
pain
pointing finger is to blame
when you don’t know who to point at
these weak arms don’t know how to act
cant stop trembling
cant stop sweat
sometimes in life it’s okay to care that much
but
they don't know
these hands don’t know
these hands don’t know
they don’t know



04. Filthy, lonely hearts

We need other people
cos other people make us forget about ourselves
i hate to lie to you
there’s no reason we’re together
just a habit of beating loneliness
taking the space you used to fill
carving a hole in me
now there’s just abyss of broken dreams
missed expectations and failed intentions
a lonely heart afraid of trusting
afraid og breaking apart
but i know its not our virtues that count on but our flaws
children of lonely hearts
there’s someone out there
set out to mend our scars
no matter how deep the wounds may be
our flaws are always complementary
so i’ll be searching for the unwanted shattered and haunted
‘cause i’m still there
and if we find one another we can rediscover lonely hearts can love again



05. Your heroes are gone

If you think you know me like you know yourself
you should take a second to reflect
you don'’t think you just react
and it must be difficult to change your ways
when they’re set on prejudice
our minds can be perplexing
but they don’t rule our worlds
it’s a deception
and you’re walking proof
“broken homes and families”
don’t pretend
don’t preach about changing the world
when you’re already gone
when your heroes are falling one by one



06. Line/get in line

You know the discomfort of not getting a thing as a child
how injustice hurt like a thorn in the eye
like being ripped from your mothers womb
it feels like i was took from her lap too soon
maybe cause i never got felt your stroke
maybe cause i never got to hold you close
to feel the roughness of your face against my cheeks
maybe that’s why at nights it’s hard to sleep
barefooted on cold grounds
thrown into the world with hounds
be invisible make no sound
hope they choose you, not the other way around
don’t tell me please i should ever stay quiet
it only makes me scream louder
it’s hard to be silent with all of the voices
telling you “always fight harder”
don’t tell me please i should love all the people
when most of them deserve hunger
it’s hard to be loving with all of the voices
screaming louder
cutting fingernails
shredding old skin
washing all the dirt off
im just circling around
promise me
your absence wasn’t the cause
quite honestly
i couldn’t care less if that was the problem
promise me
life would be the same
with your hand around me
quite honestly
i never felt what it’s like to love you
barefooted on cold grounds
thrown into the world with hounds
be invisible make no sound
hope they choose you, not the other way around
but the ground is getting warmer
i will scream from the top of my lungs
i will tame the hounds
i wont be invisible anymore
and your absence wont cripple me
it has taught me to stan in line
and wait
for everything that i mine



07. Storm inside

Getting up from bed has never been so hard
i’ll just stay here
and chat with myself, with myself
she’s just starting to whisper
and if i’m too loud she’ll go away again
then i’ll be alone
with nothing to hate but everyone
cause it’s easier to think about failing
then it is to actually fail
but i know i’ve got to try
they say life ain’t worth while
if yu never embarrass yourself
just open your mouth
and slime
from time to time
everyone knows it’s okay it’s okay
i’m sorry for not handling life the right way
i was always attention craving brat
i never knew what i wanted to be
i never know who i wanted to see
in the mirror i always hated
the person looking back at me



08. Calm after storm

Late night, still sleepless
thinking how unmoved i was
with that tape that showed you
in a brand new war uniform
you never showed any kind of distress
you smiled on pictures
but it was to impress
your high school friends
whose bodies barely grew
taken from the schoolyards so they never know
the consequences of being their kid
and what it actually means to kill
a being
still they're leaving
their mothers are grieving
did they prepare them for the killing
but still think about that tape
how could you have been so cold